One thing I know for sure from growing up in the Dub-V is that chickens smell awful, are noisy, and are usually quite mean to have around, and are some of the most stupid animals on the planet. They are dirty little buggers too, will eat just about anything.

My parents didn't raise chickens, My grandparents lived way out in the sticks and they didn't raise chickens, either. They sell them at the store for a reasonable price. And Eggs aren't too bad a price either. So what the hell is going on here?


The Urban Chicken Movement

How to Keep Chicken's in a City


When did it get trendy to raise your own damn chickens anyway? If I had a neighbor with a rooster that crowed non-stop from 4AM until around Noon on Capitol Hill; I am pretty sure I would not be the only one that wanted to deliver a beat down to that fool. I just don't get it. There's a Popeye's on every corner in this city. So maybe your kids don't need the hormones, but the way I see it, if they don't get their dose of McDonalds Super Secret Growth Formula they will be behind the curve in school. I say stick to what makes sense: a basement beer brewery and a bathtub moonshine still. That way you will be ready for the next prohibition. Leave the chicken growing up to Tyson.

Well since the rest of the hillbillies seem to be up the holler somewhere avoiding their duties to this here blog I thought I should give some updates. Hopefully the rest of you all will follow.




Let's see now. I made it back to the Dub-V to good ol Buck-Vegas for the local town festival. Always interesting and fun as a bunch of people seem to visit during that time of the year I haven't seen in a long time. Many of them never left in the first place, and I get to see some of them too. Our festival name isn't that bad. The Strawberry Festival, for which we have the Strawberry Queen. One that I always laugh about is the Poultry Festival. They actually have the poultry queen for this one. It was fun. Got to see some of the new businesses and bars that are open. Had some carnival food, got a little queasy from a couple carnival rides. These are the exact same rides they had when I was 5 years old, so this adds to the thrill I guess. Maybe I will live, maybe I will be catapulted across town in a bright colored cage. It’s all part of the fun.

Even tried out a few of the carni games. The one I thought I would be good at, the ping pong ball toss, turned out to be tougher than I thought. My skills as a semi pro beer pong player did not pay off. My girlfriend did however win us a fish that has been terrorizing the fish tank. The pet store fish just don't seem to like a fish right off the streets.

It was a good trip though. Buck-Up isn't a bad town to be from.

So Mother’s day is just around the corner folks. The day you take the Old Lady( I never understood the old lady thing, I used to hear this in high school as well) out for dinner and then stop at your favorite turn out spot on the highway, or you wash the mud off Ma’s truck tires, or go to the store to get grandma a new bag of bbq pork rinds.

However you celebrate Mother’s Day, how many of you all know its origins? I always like to point out that Mother’s Day started out in West by God Virginia, before it became the commercialized holiday, that is every holiday in this country. Anna Jarvis, who lived in, I believe, EDIT: Grafton, WV, first started to celebrate mother’s day at her church with her pastor holding a special sermon once a year. This went on for five years, until through writing her congressman; Anna was able to convince the governor of WV to set aside the second Sunday in May for Mother’s Day. A year later all states followed.

So be sure to remember ma on Sunday.

We have a hillbilly down! I repeat! We have a hillbilly down! I would like to report that R-Dub is currently suffering from acute sobriety. Doctors believe this condition has been brought about by the following:

• No Liquor
• No Sex
• No Drugs
• No Fried Chicken
• No Gambling
• No Trusty's
• No Sex
• No Moonshining in Your Bathtub
• No Stripclubs
• No Beerpong
• No Sex

The medical name for this condition is the Backed-Up Baghdad Blues, or BBB syndrome. Typically, this condition can be remedied with hard liquor and/or masturbation (sex preferably). Unfortunately, neither of those are an option. Doctors give me about 4 months before this condition becomes chronic. There is little anyone can do. I just request that I be in your thoughts and prayers.

R-Dub out.

Trout Season. I used to love this time of year. I had my favorite spots that I would hit with my younger Brother Rex as soon as I heard they had been stocked. Yeah, that's the way it goes these days in the Dub-V and I am guessing a bunch of other places. The fish are stocked as the natural population is fished out. The fish are raised in various hatcheries. Two of these facilities where close to where I grew up. I remember touring one back when I was in grade school. The fish are then stocked according to a schedule that is not made public until after the day the fish are put in the rivers. That way people are not just following the stock truck around all day even though this information does seem to leak out to certain people. Hey if your 3rd cousin Burl, drives the stock truck then I guess you can consider yourself lucky.

Stocking reports are published here:

http://www.wvdnr.gov/Fishing/stocking/DailyStock.shtm

My favorite river is listed this week. Shaver's fork (Upper Section). This is a fork of the Cheat River, before it gets polluted almost to the point that there is nothing living in it down around Morgantown. I used to love fishing this river. There was even a natural spring my brother and I would stop at and drink from right along the road.

Picture of a section of the river.


I try to go when I can; it is just a long trip to get there these days. So I just look at the pictures that are sent to me instead. Anyone know a good place to trout fish around DC? I have yet to hear of any.